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My 10 Month Struggle

Have a baby they said. It will be fun they said. Well, they weren't wrong, but gosh darn it, I haven't slept in 10 months! I was fully aware that a new baby would produce sleepless nights, but I was not prepared for a 10 month and counting affair. Mama, I. AM.TIRED!

I've tried sleep training, which to be honest, has helped tremendously to get her to put herself to sleep and not need to be rocked or held to sleep. That was a HUGE milestone for us. But sleeping through the night isn't something we know about in casa 4fsgiven. I know what you're thinking, Stella is exclusively breastfed, so she won't sleep through the night. Yes, I know. But I can dream and wish, can't I?

The last round of sleep training I started to do included weaning her off the boob at night. But then I came to the quick realization that my supply would DROP and I was only 7 months in and nowhere near our 1-year EBF goal. Needless to say, I pulled out and kept with the night feedings. I had a bit of mom guilt thinking that I should just let her sleep and forget those night feedings. But that just wasn't an option for a few reasons.

See, since I went back to work, Stella takes the bottle during the day and the only time she gets to BF is in the morning, when I get home, and all through the night. If she didn't want to do it anymore that would be one thing, but she loves her milky. I can't take away that source of nutrition and comfort. But here we are 10 months in and not one night of full sleep. I actually handle it really well. I've always burnt the candle at both ends so I have to say, I'm used to it and don't really REQUIRE 8 hours every night.

That being said, did I mention it's been 10 months of no sleep? Yeah, so there is that. I have to admit, I've been debating and researching if I should supplement with the dreaded F word, Formula! I finally found one that didn't use any corn syrups but the downfall is that they use milk and soy. Two things I won't feed myself, let alone my baby girl. So, there goes that.

I know another option is to feed her more. While that is good advice, it's not proven to help babies sleep better/longer. Stella is eating her fair share of fruits, veggies, and cereals along with her milk. This girl has her dad's appetite, along with many of his other traits. I'm at a loss. I even consulted with my IBCLC friends to see what I can do. And there doesn't seem to be much more to do other than stick it out or stop her night feedings. The latter is definitely not happening so I guess I will stick it out.

If you have any advice, I am all ears!

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